Результаты поиска по запросу "what if my mom"

Хреновина

#Приколы для даунов

$зпшпш 1 ¡ 1И1H1 • ] [Tlfïïj |<l IJ Гм >il:| a T л i УР*?Д? ^ .... .J7f\,Приколы для даунов,разное$

megalomart

#Хейтдомanti my little ponyпониебы

dreman

A. ShipwrightartistFantasyartнекромантTraditional artдлинопост

Their Stories

A.SHlPWWGrtT,A. Shipwright,artist,Fantasy,Fantasy art,art,арт,некромант,Traditional art,длинопост

"Hey young man. This is not the closest way to the Bulgewater County. You better choose the west road of the Wisteria Crossroad."
"Oh look at this thick skin. Everybody's waiting for their turn and now you want to get buried in such nice place far far away?
Hey, you better go to my grave plot. It's much closer and so beautifu..."
"I heard your goddamned hometown story for hundreds of times that my ossicles almost worn out, ma'am.
Why don't we just shut up for this painful journey? You can have some talks with the devils after burial."
"Your sister's pelvis was so huge that even three baby skulls could go through the hole."
"That bastard is talking shit again. I heard he was mental and still barking like a dog even after brain fluid dried out."
"My jaw! Where is my jaw! I can't eat without my jaw!"
"His jaw was gone sucking dragon dick."
"This rude boy is ignoring me again! I told you Bulgewater County is not this way..."

----------------------------------

They Talk Too Much

,A. Shipwright,artist,Fantasy,Fantasy art,art,арт,некромант,Traditional art,длинопост

"I told you not to go this way."
"Hey lad. Your fighting stance is awkward as hell."
"Your mama's tit was so huge that her ribs were bent."
"He's so nice as always. Drop me off here."
"We're dead! We're all dead. All because of that stupid gravekeeper!"
"Where is my jaw?"
"When I was young, I found no monsters as ugly as this one."

-----------------------------

They Still Talk

A. Sb'pwrigbl,A. Shipwright,artist,Fantasy,Fantasy art,art,арт,некромант,Traditional art,длинопост

"Amazing, lad! Transforming our remains into spirit form, what a magic!"
"If I didn't know you, i would have thought that you were trying to kill us all! I know this sort of sorcery, and they use this spell to destroy the undeads."
"Your mama's spine is so bent that you can use it in math class as protractor."
"Good to be together as always. It's hard to find nice lad like this fellow these days."
"Where is my jaw? I can't find my jaw!"
"Huh! You call this a magic! Back in my days..."
"Hey young man, do you even hear me?"

------------------------------

Take Them Please

$ i щ А ’ V ИР*?2/ \'ЯШ JW г к Я И *- о i,A. Shipwright,artist,Fantasy,Fantasy art,art,арт,некромант,Traditional art,длинопост$

"Mortal. I ask you to yield one of those heads."
"I can't."
"You cherish life of the deads more than yours? How touching."
"No really. I can't."

------------------------------

Put Your Hand on My Shoulder

‘Ä.Sfyip^rvicrtt,A. Shipwright,artist,Fantasy,Fantasy art,art,арт,некромант,Traditional art,длинопост

"Hey young lad. You're just passing by that poor giant's body and you call yourself a gravekeeper?"
"Knock it off you bloody dotard."
"Haha! We heard you talking back to our word! Today's a special day!"

------------------------------

The Protectors

I hear dead people.
And they never fxxking shut up.

------------------------------

Dead Men Tell A Lot of Tales

"That's a mighty fine necromancy, summoning the dead severed arm!"
"And he didn't raise us from dead with such skill."
"Where is my jaw."
"If we knew he could do that we would've never apologized him."
"I mean, it's pretty absurd to blame us for dragging monster's attention by our chatter. It's monster that cut off his arm, not us."

--------------------------------

Manga Style Necromancy

"Fight with me."
"Wait, we never agreed that."
"I will never forget you."
"I said we never agreed that."
"SOUL CRUSHER."
"You motherf-."

------------------------------

"Your Move, Old Man."

"Look at that ruddy bastard grabbing old man's head."
"Where is my jaw."
"Back in my days, even rudest of all showed respect to the elders.
Kids these days ignore the aged men and their wisdom.
Back in my days, no one would've allowed this to happen.
The kings had to get off their horse to salute me on the road."
"When yer mom rolled on the pen with the pigs."
"Where is my fxxking jaw, you bloody ruffians."

-------------------------------

Necro-man

^hipiuriqW-,A. Shipwright,artist,Fantasy,Fantasy art,art,арт,некромант,Traditional art,длинопост

Even though the sword is broken dead, I can call its soul back.
Arm is the most basic type of shield.
My revived arm will be a shield.
This is my necromancy.

------------------------------

Starved Pistol of Diliworth

Starved Pistol of Diliworth.
One of the haunted relics made by infamous weapon inventor Godin Elwiv of Eldrian two centuries ago.
The soul of people who were killed by him is stored inside.
Danger Rank High. Never touch.
P.S. My dear pupil who never ever read nor listen to my words.
I leave this postscript for I thought you would've ignore that warning.
At least don't fire this pistol twice.
The chance of it taking user's soul increases geometrically on the second fire.

------------------------------

Hellblade

"Old man. Sword."
"Arfwgerraworf"

--------------------------------

You Must Fly

ASkowriaht,A. Shipwright,artist,Fantasy,Fantasy art,art,арт,некромант,Traditional art,длинопост

"Damn, I'm terribly sorry lady.
This is what my necromancy do.
Look at my arm. Revived in strange form of my true nature.
I guess your soul looks like a fish, swimming freely in the air.
At least you can fly instead of having normal leg oh what the hell am I talking about. I'm really...
Oh... Uh... I guess you like it.
Thank you."

-----------------------------------

One is Gone

A.SVïipw!ôW qQqQq,A. Shipwright,artist,Fantasy,Fantasy art,art,арт,некромант,Traditional art,длинопост

My masters, all six of them, told me not to talk to the deads.
The deads never come back to life. That's undeniable truth. The truth that people left behind want to deny so much.
The soul of the dead leaves this world over the curtain of our realm forever.
What we call ghost is just an embodiment of remaining thought, emotion, or memory of the deads.
That's why they cannot talk normally, always want though need nothing, and stick to something obstinately.
It is difficult to remove them peacefully unless you follow certain rules and process originated from the deceased.
The deads are not the ones you knew.
Now I can understand why they taught me that over and over again.
It is obvious how I'll react to the false hallucination of my masters when they pass away.

Aisord

GasterUndertale персонажиUndertaleфэндомыAnnoying Dog

This was the original 3rd Anniversary picture I drew! So I guess Undertale’s mom let it have TWO birthday pictures this time.

This was my first time drawing a less goopy Gaster! I’m not entirely sure if I’m happy with this style for him. If/when I draw him again I’ll probably end up tweaking a few things here and there.

You guys thought Papyrus was the hardest Undertale character to draw? That’s a lie! The hardest Undertale character to draw is THE ANNOYING DOG!!! What a nightmare…

I will simply repeat what I said on the previous picture!

Happy 3rd Anniversary, Undertale!

Thank you for showing up and dragging me out of a bad head space. Thank you for CONTINUING to drag my ass out of bad headspaces. Thank you for being so positive, and sharing a genuine message of love and kindness! Thank you for introducing me to so many good, kind-hearted people who have become my dearest of friends!

And thank you for completely and 100% understanding both my sense of humour, but also my want and need for affection and tenderness.

The flowers are suppose to be a halo but they ended up looking more like an afro OTL.

Tumblr

KTyJIXy

Комиксысам перевелowl my god

( Так... Уже реально у юра написать чёртов* эссее. Срок до завтра.
Что. блядь за нахуй?!
фокрастинатор.
Приготовься...
facebook.com/оуу1тудоЬ,Смешные комиксы,веб-комиксы с юмором и их переводы,сам перевел,owl my god

CanisMajoris

MorrowindThe Elder Scrollsфэндомыtes videoпервоисточник в комментах

Братишки, я вам новый мемес нашел

Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
itl be an honour
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Balmora

In Gold Coast Cyrodiil born and raised
On the anvil docks I spent most of my days
maxing' out grindin' increasing' my skills
And all shootin some crossbows inside the school
When a couple of guards who were up to no good
Started making trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one little fight over a bottle of ale
he said thats it! I've had it! your going to jail

I begged and pleaded with him only kiddin
but he kicked my ass and threw me in prison
but then he came back down and when he leaned right in
he told me you are gonna be released in Morrowind

slave class, back of the ship
eating damp old bread with my new pal jiub
is this what morrowind outlanders are treated like?
Hmmmmm this cant be alright.

But wait I hear they're racist, all, ash and tar
Is this the type of dump that they send this groovy guar?
what will they think
i hope its not horror
they all better watch for the prince of Balmora

Well, the boat landed and when I came out
There was a dude looked like santa standing there with my name out
I dont want any damn assecion
I just got here
gotta custom class i aint answering your questions

through the census gave the dude there a holla
he had a steel sword and imperial Templar armor
told me Caius Cosades was a man with honor
But I thought 'ill forget it' - 'Serah to Balmora'

I pulled up to the town about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the strider 'Yo swit smell ya later'
I looked at my kingdom
Its about to get hotter
when i sit on my throne as the Prince of Balmora