why go to school

Сhild: Daddy?
Dad:  Yes?
Сhild: I'm going to tell you a story.
  The story of a man who wakes up one morning in a forest.
Сhild: It's summertime. His daughter is there.
Dad:  Why in a forest?
Сhild: It's just a background. It's because he feels lonely.
Dad:  What's his daughter doing?
Сhild: Nothing ...
Сhild: She's pregnant.
Dad:  But... His daughter is 8 years old!
Child: Yes... So he says to himself.
Dad:  It's impossible! She hasn't got breasts anyway!
Dad:  How is she going to give birth?!
Child: No, he says to himself: "Someone fucked my daughter!"
Dad:  Right! I agree! It's unacceptable!
Child: So suddenly, this man is cold. He feels like going back to bed.
Dad:  In fact, it's just the story of a man afraid of growing old, right?
Child: Or the story of a motionless man in an evolving world.
Dad:  Is there an end to your story?
Child: At the end, his daughter hugs him very hard, sobs a little bit,
  and tells him:
Child: Daddy... snf... I don't want to grow up...
Dad:  Mh... I prefer it when I tell my own stories.
Child: Tonight, it's your turn.
Child: But right now, I need a big bowl of corn flakes,
  I'm going to be late for school.

Гугл переводчик:
Дочка: Папа?
Папа:  Да?
Дочка: Я расскажу тебе историю.
  История человека, который однажды утром просыпается в лесу.
Дочка: Сейчас лето. Его дочь там.
Папа:  Почему в лесу?
Дочка: Это просто фон. Это потому, что он чувствует себя одиноким.
Папа:  Что делает его дочь?
Дочка: Ничего...
Дочка: Она беременна.
Папа:  Но... Его дочери 8 лет!
Дочка: Да... Так он говорит себе.
Папа:  Это невозможно! У нее все равно нет груди!
Папа:  Как она собирается рожать?!
Дочка: Нет, он говорит себе: «Кто-то трахнул мою дочь!»
Папа:  Верно! Я согласен! Это недопустимо!
Дочка: Внезапно он замерз. Ему хочется вернуться в постель.
Папа:  На самом деле это просто история о человеке, который боится стареть, да?
Дочка: Или история неподвижного человека в развивающемся мире.
Папа:  Есть ли конец у твоей истории?
Дочка: В конце дочка очень крепко его обнимает, немного всхлипывает,
  говорит ему:
Дочка: Папа... снф... Я не хочу взрослеть...
Папа:  Мм... Я предпочитаю рассказывать свои собственные истории.
Дочка: Сегодня твоя очередь.
Дочка: Но сейчас мне нужна большая миска кукурузных хлопьев.
  Я собираюсь опоздать в школу.

Мне всего 19 лет! Какого хрена!!! (Фулл-ХД кстати)

1,2,1,2,3,4

We accept her, one of us, we accept her, one of us!

Gooble gobble gooble gobble!

We accept her, we accept her!

We accept her, one of us, we accept her, one of us!

Gooble gobble gooble gobble!

We accept her, we accept her!


(We-we) we came, we saw, we kicked it's ass,

I was testing you - and you passed,

Dental plan! Lisa needs braces,

Be required to fart on a regular basis,

I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse,

Channel 13 - Eyewitness news!

Robocop, who is he?

Dead or alive you're coming with me.


In a hurry to be fed, beady eyes and big blue head.


I'm telling the truth Doc, you gotta believe me,

Why does everything I whip leave me?

My beautiful chocolate! Candy is dandy,

Fava beans and a nice Chianti,

You can count on Slippery Pete,

Suicide will be nice and neat!

I didn't build the Panama canal,

Open the pod bay doors please, HAL,


These aren't the droids you're looking for,

These aren't the droids we're looking for,

I am not a number I am a free man!

Rosebud.

To The Idiotmobile!

Right away Michael,

I-I-I-I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered.


We came, we saw, we kicked it's ass,

You don't understand I coulda had class,

Round and tasty on a bun,

Ooh Zippy look what you've done!

Finally! Cast off those lines!

No, I've been nervous lots of times,

Red Rum! What's the matter honey?

Just robbed Boss Hogg all of his money!


We came, saw, we kicked it's ass,

Writing checks your body can't cash,

I was elected to lead, not read,

I feel the need - the need for speed,

Watch out for snakes, a good man's loafer,

HQ - my hat looks like a muffin - over,

My god it's full of stars,

There was no driver in the car..


In the car (repeat)


Well you see I'm in hot pursuit!


There are only two things I love in this world - everybody and television!

#The Simpsons

#Run With Us!

Ugh - you must be shrooming,

Wait for me Moomin!

Cross live to meet the host of that show, Meat Boy,

I want to go to there.


We came, we saw, we kicked it's ass,

An oil tycoon - like a.. moustache,

Nice beaver! I just had it stuffed,

I don't give a shit, close enough,

Where's me washboard? I'll get me coat,

Y-y-y-you're gonna need a bigger boat,

What'd she say? I think she bought it,

Suck it monkeys! I'm goin' corporate!

C'mon let's take a drive! A drive?

Number 5 is alive!

It's only a laugh, no harm done,

Pickles, french fries, yum yum yum,

Bueller, Bueller, Bueller,

It's 2 degrees cooler,

The light that burns twice as bright burns half as long,

Six words in the whole song.


We-we-we accept her, one of us, we accept her, one of us!

Gooble gobble gooble gobble!

We accept her, we accept her!

You are number 6 5 4 3 2

I am not a number, I am a free man


We came, we saw, we kicked it's ass,

Give me my 20,000 in cash,

We came, we saw, we kicked it's ass,

I think you woke up the dead with that blast

We came, we saw, we kicked it's ass,

I think fast, I talk fast,

We came, we saw, we kicked it's ass,

Lois, this is not my Batman glass,

Crystal

Ни разу не художник, но пришла в голову идея, так почему бы и нет...